a year ago today, around this time, i got a phone call that i never thought i would get. i actually thought it was my dad calling to make fun of me for second-guessing buying sports court tiles because i’m neurotic like that. it was my dad but instead it was something that would shatter life as i knew it and change me forever. not a day goes by that i am not devastated, angry, regretful, and so many other feelings. i love and miss you so much, Steven, my baby brother who i always looked up to. i hope the fishing and cars are good up there and that there’s a really scary rollercoaster that you can convince me to go on as well as other dumb-ass adventures. until then…